That time I Interviewed PATRICK WARBURTON

STRAIGHT PEOPLE WE LOVE

Silly, Puddy

Seinfeld’s dishy, deadpan musclebear Patrick Warburton shares funny-poignant stories with his queer admirers

ANAL-RETENTIVE DADDY: In “The Dish,” Warburton plays a know-it-all NASA consultant.

By DANIEL KUSNER | April 27, 2001

Only Seinfeld’s Elaine Benes (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) would be woman enough to handle an egotistical musclebear like David Puddy, played by swoony-hunk Patrick Warburton. 

Though Puddy only appeared in nine episodes, Warbuton’s drier-than-a-martini wit and furry torso left an indelible impression in gay viewers’ minds.

“Yes. I know that there’s a particular sect of the gay men who’ve been admiring my performances,” Warburton laughs during a recent phone interview. “Let’s just say that I’ve always felt the warmth of their love. And I think it’s a huge compliment.”

Warburton — who’s 35 and 6’3” — is happily married and has three children. 

LIKE PUDDY IN OUR HANDS: Furry-funny Warburton.

Seinfeld defined his career. But casting directors presume Warburton can only play a narrow range of characters.

“Most people are only interested in casting me for Puddy types — guileless guys with deadpan wit. However, Puddy was never stupid,” he says.

In the inspired Australian comedy The Dish, which hits theaters today, Warburton surprises viewers as an anal-retentive NASA exec who clashes with an eccentric Aussie crew in charge of a mammoth telescope receiving video signals from the Apollo XI mission.

“When I was called about playing Al Burnett [in The Dish], I was surprised. And asked them why they wanted me,” he says. “Turns out that the director really liked my work and thought I was a good choice for the role, which isn’t an enormous departure from Puddy. But Al Burnett’s a really straight-laced guy. So I was more than happy about taking it on.”

Warburton has a considerable body of work under his belt: Scream 3, Newsradio and the scene-stealing voice of Kronk, the puppy-like, bodybuilding manservant of Yzma (Eartha Kitt) in The Emperor’s New Groove.

You can also catch Warburton in a much-televised advertising campaign for M&Ms. 

VINTAGE WARBURTON: An early-modeling tearsheet.

His first film, the Caribbean slavery-revolt flop The Master of Dragonard Hill (1989) — starring Eartha Kitt and Oliver Reed — is the one performance he wants everyone to forget.

“It is the biggest piece of shit, I swear. And I’m the worst thing in the whole fucking movie,” he laughs in agony.

Three big-time Warburton projects are about to drop: Joe Dirt, a white-trash comedy that was shot in West Texas, director Barry Sonnenfeld’s black-comedy, Miami-crime bonanza Big Trouble and the lead role in The Tick, a TV series based on the comic book action-hero about a parasitic louse-fly.

TICK-TICK BOOM! Warburton stars in the colorfully funny insect-hero series “The Tick.”

Warburton hopes these new efforts will help erase his first dramatic screen appearance.

And for this interview, Warburton wanted to share a couple of queer-humor anecdotes about his dauntlessly religious parents.

“My father is a former monk. And my mom is a hardcore Right-to-Life Catholic. When I was going to rehearsal for my second episode of Seinfeld, my mom sent me a ‘Converting to Catholicism’ videotape to give to cast members — like Jerry and Julia. I could have died,” he laughs.

“I live out in LA. And this wonderful gay couple are my next-door neighbors,” Warburton continues. “They started getting all this ex-gay literature in the mail that was postmarked from my parents’ hometown in Florida. I finally had to call my mom and beg her to stop.”

Warburton says his parents “truly are wonderful people — they’re just a little misguided. My very first agent was gay. And he started getting really sick because he had AIDS.” 

So his parents moved Warburton’s agent into their guesthouse and cared for him for several months. 

“I thought it was a beautiful thing they did for him. But get this — even when he was that sick, my mom was still trying to convince him to become straight.”

Daniel Kusner’s Straight People We Love runs the third Friday of every month.